Dec 01 2008
Ex and wife drive me nuts
Lately my ex has been a huge pain in the butt because he is now married to a very pushy woman. I was married to him for 15 years and left him because he was emotionally and sometimes physically abusive toward me. I didn’t have a car or a job when I asked him to leave. I just wanted something more. He was never home, didn’t spend time with me or the kids. I should have left earlier but I was stuck financially. I finally decided that enough was more than enough.
Now 5 years later, he meets this woman online, moves in with her two months later and then marries her 6 months later. Within 1 month of being married, she tried to get custody of my daughter! Her reason? My daughter is not doing well in school. She is not doing her homework or studying for tests. The wife wants me to sit there and do her projects for her to boost her grades. Anyone who has been to a school science fair has seen the perfect looking projects turned in, obviously done by the parents. This doesn’t help the kids and it teaches them that they are incompetent and they need to cheat to pass. My parents didn’t do my work for me.
She is very controlling and thinks she can now tell me how to raise my kids. Well, sorry honey, but that is not happening. She can lead my ex around by his short leash, but I’m not going there. Also, he suddenly is super dad. The man has never taken an interest in their school, healthcare, or anything else except for sports. Now he is trying to give me advice on parenting. Ha!
I get at least 10 calls and sometimes 20 emails a week from them! I never had this much contact with him when we were married. They have no idea that they are as annoying as hell. He calls my answering machine and yells hello…hello into it and then hangs up with no message. It is in my LR, and my son has a cell he could call. I have called their house maybe ten times in two years, they call my house probably 30-40 times per week. I wish I could change my number.
Now this morning my son came to me wanting money for a ticket to a banquet for my son making all-state. He asked his dad if he wanted to go, and he declined. He asked me and my bf and we said yes. The next day, my son called hin again and asked and they said no. Then they changed their mind(after the b**ch found out)and said they were going. My son looked into them purchasing tickets themselves which they can. On the last day tickets are on sale, they sent in money for one ticket and told me I had to buy the other. I found out at 7 am, the day after the shopping spree we did this weekend for Christmas. Luckily I had bill money I broke into. That was really nice.
They seem to think that they can tell me how to run my life. Well I am the queen of my castle and I really don’t want their unsolicited advice. However, if anybody out there has any real advice on how to deal with a pushy ex- let me know.
I feel your pain. I had to put my ex in his place a long time ago. I simply told him, “This is the way it is going to be, or it’s not going to be at all. I’m holding all the cards and you’re just playing my game.” The stress of constant bickering wasn’t going to cut it. He learned that my custody papers gave me quite a bit of power and he backed off quickly. Hope things get better for you!